joshguessed

45th Ask Josh – 9 minutes to live

In Uncategorized on October 30, 2008 at 10:01 pm

Jessi Kay said…


If someone told you had exactly 9 minutes to live, what would you do in those 9 minutes?


Dear Jessi Kay,

If I had 9 minutes to live I’d sit quietly.  No need to panic.  Anyone I would even consider calling would freak out if I told them the news.  I might call in to work and let them know I won’t be coming in.  If I found out at work I would probably clock out, you know how they freak out if you miss a timecard punch.  And if it did happen at work, I may as well go down to Taco Bell and get a cheesy gordita crunch.  I always get one of those during my 10 minute break. Granted, I would have to eat it a little faster because I only have 9 minutes this time.

Since it is my last meal and all, I’ll go for the $1.86 Gordita as opposed to my daily $0.89 Cheesy Double Beef burrito.  I suppose I would go find a private place to eat my gordita, since I wouldn’t want to go dying in public.  But if there was a line I would probably go pick up a Daily Universe and get working on the crossword puzzle.  I would give away my laptop, watch, ipod, and any cash on hand to the nearest bystanders

If I found out while I was in class I would probably just go back to sleep.

If I found out while I was in my apartment, I would tell Dexter that I always liked Congi, and I don’t mind the smell of the house when he cooks. And I’d pick up a book and read it.  

If I found out while I was on a date, I would pick up the check, give the car keys to my date and have her drive herself home, then I would go to the washroom.

You see, 9 minutes really is not a lot of time for me to really get much done as far as “things to do before you die” or to do some kind of deathbed repentance.  

In the end, I would take my 9 minutes to find you and say, “This is all your fault.”
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  1. You can’t make this stuff up. Oh wait, I guess you can, because you did.

  2. I think I would send a mass text to all those on my phonebook because obviously I would not keep there number if I don’t like them or if they serve no purpose. And I would tell people where my body would be so like a herd of cats wouldn’t eat my eyes….yep, that’s an Ashlyn thing.

  3. Actually its jessie kay, emphasis on the “e” not jessi kay. bahaha.. just clearin that up. One hot summer afternoon, while walking through a parking lot at a large shopping center, you notice a dog suffering badly from the heat inside a locked car. What would you do?

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