joshguessed

31st Ask Josh – Signs Guys See

In Uncategorized on October 16, 2008 at 10:34 pm

darkwing duck said…


Josh, you’ve given us how you think boys show interest. What about the other way around? What do girls do that make guys think they’re interested?

………

Dear Darkwing Duck,

Let me tell you something right now; I don’t think, I know when a girl is interested in yours truly.  Allow me to illustrate by some of the signs that girls drop to me all the time.  I am kind of embarrassed for all the girls who thought they were being so subtle, but I saw right through their little games.  I know what they’re trying to say when they:

  • Say things like, “Hey, are you supposed to be in this class?”
  • Enroll in the exact same classes that I am going to, even when I am not even enrolled in those classes.
  • Say things like, “Hey, are you okay?” After I trip over a trash can.
  • Try to stare you down and make you trip into trash cans.
  • Leave your Facebook friendship as merely “pending”
  • Deny your Facebook friendship to play hard-to-get.
  • Dump their garbage at the exact same dumpster that you use every week.
  • Show up at your work and say things like, “Hey, how do I get to One Stop?”
  • Say things like, “Is your name really Frodo?”
  • Date my roommates.  (Yeah, I know what you’re trying to say.  And I’m disappointed that you would stoop so low to date my roommate just to get to me. Just say what you mean to say.)
  • Say things like, “Can I borrow a pen for a second?” Even if it is to the person on the other side of her.  I know she didn’t ask me because she’s shy.
  • Tells me things like, “I’ve been engaged for a while, actually.” (Yeah, like I’ve never heard that one before.  Come on, I’ve heard it over two dozen times. Mix it up a bit, huh?)
  • call me back after I call them.
  • don’t call me back after I call them (Yeah, I know you’re playing it both ways).
  • tell me you’re not that interested (Oh how I enjoy hearing you go on with those sweet little lies).
  • forget my name even though I took the time to remember yours (I know you forget the name, but you never forget the feeling).
  • keep coming back to the testing center where we first met (I was camped out at the front door, and I still am.  You keep coming back every couple weeks or so.  I know what keeps you coming back).
  • Every day you keep on coming back to Subway and ordering that Veggie Delite on wheat bread (you know that’s my favorite sandwich).

Anyway, we know that you’re interested.  And don’t think that we don’t know. Believe me, we know.  And we’re really flattered.  And believe me, we’re plotting our next move.  One of these days we just might walk up to you and ask you to make us a Veggie Delite on wheat bread, or we’ll call you back (or not, either way you’ll know), or we’ll leave your Facebook friendship pending.  That’s how you’ll know.

Have a wonderful day.

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  1. I was laughing out loud in the LRC. Thanks for this one Joshua

  2. hahahahahahahahaha!!!!!! josh you crack me up!!! so basically every girl in the world is into you! it’s a great way to see the world. loves!

  3. thank you, Josh. I had no idea.

  4. question: what if there was no such thing as a rhetorical question?

  5. i would have really enjoyed the real response to this question

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